Sleeping soon.

Just took my medicine. Doctor gave me sleeping pills cause my headache is seriously causing my sleep big time.

HOPE IT DOES NOT RAIN TOMORROW. (:

Am going to sleep now. What a day, sucks big time.

P.s — i just want to be happy.

B. ):

It seems like there is only one person that could make my life happier and you are right. Is B.

But B would not even care about me at all. Sigh, am going to sleep, just ate pills. Long day tomorrow. Should i go band? I HATE GOING FOR NP BAND PRACTICE FOR SOME REASON, I FEEL STRESS BUT I LOVE BAND. is like ironic. sigh.

hope chelsea win btw.

time to sleep, EM2 teacher is so going to screw me tomorrow. AI YA WHATEVER. LIKE I CARE.

P.s — sorry B for calling you. ):

Sleeping pills.

Coughing badly and my nose is full of mucus. seriously, i just sleep and sleep. ):
My head is hurting me big time. ):
I really can’t help breaking down. Is like damn pessimistic for me. Sigh, am going back to sleep once i had my lunch. ):

I think sleeping pills will make one more pessimistic, as in seriously. My eyes are swollen due to it too. ):

Hypnotic (also called soporific) drugs are a class of psychoactives whose primary function is to induce sleep[1] and to be used in the treatment of insomnia and in surgical anesthesia. Because drugs in this class generally produce dose-dependent effects, ranging from anxiolysis to production of unconsciousness, they are often referred to collectively as sedative-hypnotic drugs. ( from wikipedia. )

Will study IPC when i wake up. There is test tomorrow. ): ARGH i feel so fcuk up. headache. ):
WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY. AIYA FCUK OFF LA. WHATEVER LA.

P.s — Like i say, fcuk off.

I really, miss B. ):

I’m already gone, already gone
You can’t make it feel right
When you know that it’s wrong
I’m already gone, already gone
There’s no moving on
So I’m already gone
But I want you to move on
So I’m already gone

Dont you find the last two sentence of that lyrics meaningful? is by kelly clarkson – Already gone.

I still remember B telling me that, i must be happy when she is happy. Whenever i think of this sentence, i just cant help but to cry. Is simply too hard for me to accept the fact you understand? is too sudden for me. But oh well. 3months+ had passed.

Just tried calling B, cause i just can’t stand it. Am crying badly now, i just feel damn stress. Some friends are just that hard to handle. Why some friends are like that? why cant they be like, be there when needed, no quarrels, talk things out nicely. I really don’t understand. But B did’t pick up her phone, as usual. I really feel damn stress.

Sorry if i offend anyone. I just feel very stress out.

P.s — I just want to be alone.

Feel empty.

Nowadays i feel so weird, watching movie without B beside me. Is like normally, there is someone beside me, holding my hand, and being there for me. But now, is like you know. Haha, dont feel like blogging actually, nothing much to talk about.

Didt go band as usual. Thanks to my cousin for booking the movie ticket, if not i would had stayed at home. Saw alot of people today. What a day i should say.

Woke up at around 10 plus, slept again till 1plus-2. Went out, seriously, i was like under the effect of sleeping pills.( till now i am still suffering from it. ) Is like some drug which makes you high high and make you tired and get frustrated easily. IT IS SUPER ADDICTIVE. am so going to stop eating it. ):

Hais, i miss B alot. Do B read my blog? i doubt so. ):

I just lost a friend, a close friend i should say. Sigh, life is full of up and down.

Oh yeah watch New Moon today.

HIS BODY IS OMFG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG.HAHAHAHA ok enough.

Time to get some rest. (:

I MISS ALOT PEOPLE LEH HOW? YOU ALL TELL ME HOW LEH HOW?!

Oh yeah, my cousin spent 300+ on a Armani exchange jacket while i spend only like 160+ on shoes shirt and chocolate. HAHA. My cousin is a rich bastard! RAWR.

Ok time to rest and watch tv while talk with R and others on msn. (:

P.s — If you are reading my blog, take some time to think about the friendship we once had.

Dedicated to B.

Sometimes i hate to face it but then i really have no other choice. At times, i do really wish that this is just a dream and i have yet to wake up from it. It is really hard to face the fact that B is gone from my life. Is like, once we were lover, and now, we are not even friends neither do we contact at all. I really wish that B would come back to my life and at least be my friends. But then again, it is all a fantasy. It will never going to happen.

Well, i really am lost and i really do not know what to do. Been 3months plus and i am still being the same old me who just can’t face the fact. Everyday i just live as though i am very happy, everyday i just live as though nothing happen, when i do feel sad, i would just pop some sleeping pills, or go and do some work out till i am totally worn out and just go to bed. But whenever i go to bed, i really wish that B would just text me a message or at least care about me. But i know is impossible. B dont even treat me as a friend nor anything, i think i am considered as an it instead of he. Is like, i am totally out of her life.

I really wish that everything would turn back in time and everything would just seems so happy, hugging her, having her around my arms, going through everything together, instead of me being alone, being lost in my own world. Everyday i just try my best to make my life happy, live my life to the fullest. I just force myself not to think about B whenever i am sad neither do i want to spam her messages or phone calls.

I really wish to talk to B and hope that she would read my blog at times, but i doubt so. Just feel sad that currently i am ill and that the one that used to be by my side aint here and i have to face things myself. Maybe that’s what we considered as being independent. I see B like living as though every are normal and me myself i am here being upset over what had happened. Sometimes, i really wish that i can face the fact that nothing can change the fact and i must face it and live with it. Sometimes i just feel so weak without the presence of B and yet, she do not read my blog nor my messages. At times i just hope that she would realize how much i miss her.

Oh well, going to get some sleep. Am going to restart my pokemon cause i find that my pokemon are really weak. Ok random but yeah, am no joke. (: Sorry for the emotional post cause i really miss B alot but the message just cant reach out to her. Her life is definitely better then mine. (:

P.s — i am happy when you are happy B. misses.

Sleep sleep and sleep. ):

All i can do now is sleep, rest and sleep. ): Not going for band this saturday, need to get well soon first.
Going out for dinner later on with Lesden and Mr.Chan. Although am sick but it takes like a million years for Lesden to be free in order to go out together. Damn tired, am off to bed. (:

Been such a long time since someone actually care and ask me to take care of myself when i am sick, that definitely brighten up my day. (:

P.s — I just need to get some rest. (: & a haircut.

Old memories.

Just came back from clinic. Am really having a bad flu, sorethroat and fever. Headache really killing me. ):

Last time, when i am sick, B would always accompany me to see doctor and then get some food like mee siam or such at the market nearby. (:

What a memory, been such a long time since i last ate BBQ stingray, ever since break up it seems like i did not eat those that i used to already. Oh well, memories memories memories.

Never ending memories. Will just eat the medicine and go and sleep. How i wish she would show some concern for me. HAHA.                       IMPOSSIBLE!

P.s — Thanks dorothea for showing SOME concern though. (: STOP EMOING!

ill

Am going to see doctor now, down with flu, sorethroat, fever and headache.

Feeling terrible. Can’t even sleep properly. ): Doubt i will get well soon.

P.s — Speechless. Only feel like resting.

Can’t sleep.

AM FREAKING TIRED! is like, tired to the max and yet i am still here blogging cause i can’t sleep. I seriously hate my throat man. Is like inside got something wriggling and itching it. Keep coughing and my nose is block and it hurts around the throat area. ok i am like seeing a doctor now. LOL as in i am talking as though i am seeing a doctor now.

Doubt i will be going for band tomorrow.

I HAVE TO REPEAT THIS COUNTLESS OF TIMES CAUSE I SIMPLY THINK SOME FRIENDS ARE SIMPLY JUST FCUK UP TO THE MAX!

blog is a good place to vent anger around. HAHA.

Oh well, will try to sleep again. Tried laying on the bed for an hour just now. (:

P.s — miss the good old times. where me you where there.